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PostPosted: Fri Jun 26, 2015 8:54 am 
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Chapter 6!

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PostPosted: Fri Jun 26, 2015 9:00 am 
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Seems like Tim being unarmed and at NCIS is a good step closer to figuring out what's going on.

I wonder how long it'll be before Ubica finds out his plan has gone wrong...

ETA: I just looked up ubica, I knew the word looked familiar! I have no idea if it was intentional and I shan't mention the translation, and I don't know for sure it was your intent since I don't think we have details on Ubica's background, but I feel a plonker for not seeing it sooner :rolleyes: :rofl:

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PostPosted: Fri Jun 26, 2015 9:26 am 
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Oh, it's intentional, Sarah. I spent a good hour deciding on his name. A lot of my character names are like that, especially the villains. ;D

Dr. Ubica really is out of town. What better cover than being gone? So unless someone contacts him, he won't have a clue.

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PostPosted: Fri Jun 26, 2015 11:35 am 
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I thought it couldn't really be a coincidence. It's been poking at my brain from the start and when I looked it up it made sense. That would have been some coincidence! ("I don't believe in coincidence!")

I also found out (quite coincidentally during my search) that a certain kind of whale is called essentially the same in... that particular language... as it is in English; kit ubica! That's your random factoid for the day ;D

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PostPosted: Fri Jun 26, 2015 11:39 am 
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Fascinating! I didn't know about that. I love having the names mean something. In my story Key to Nowhere, a character in it has the last name Schicksal which means nothing. In Dancing in the Dark, the name of the town was a corrupted phrase which means dance of death. ;D Usually, I do it just for myself, but sometimes, I'll share. :D

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PostPosted: Fri Jun 26, 2015 11:50 am 
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"kit" or something like it means the same thing in several related languages - probably more than I'm aware of, but several closely related languages (dialects) and at least two more distantly related that I'm aware of, so when I saw kit ubica in the search results I figured it might mean that and I had to investigate!

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PostPosted: Fri Jun 26, 2015 3:29 pm 
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Poor Tim is really fighting that compulsion, and it must be completely horrible for him to be aware that something is so wrong but he can't do anything about it. I think you're doing a very good job showing the Jekyll/Hyde nature of this thing.

I suspect Dr. Ubica is in for a nasty surprise when he returns. At least I hope so.

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PostPosted: Fri Jun 26, 2015 4:15 pm 
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Thanks! I can only imagine how strange it would be to have your body doing things you don't want to do, but Tim is fighting it as best he can.

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PostPosted: Fri Jun 26, 2015 5:26 pm 
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Can't wait to see how this plays out!

No vomments on this chapter, either. :lol2:

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PostPosted: Fri Jun 26, 2015 5:27 pm 
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:evillaugh: I think that one might stick, y'know. I really like it ;D

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PostPosted: Fri Jun 26, 2015 5:32 pm 
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I think it should be the official name for bad, anon reviews :lol2:

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PostPosted: Fri Jun 26, 2015 5:34 pm 
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I agree. :yes:

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PostPosted: Fri Jun 26, 2015 5:46 pm 
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Well, I'm glad I'm not getting any. ;D

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PostPosted: Fri Jun 26, 2015 5:48 pm 
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Oh, now that's just inviting trouble :rofl:

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PostPosted: Fri Jun 26, 2015 5:50 pm 
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:th_uhoh2:

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PostPosted: Sat Jun 27, 2015 9:09 am 
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Chapter 7!

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PostPosted: Sat Jun 27, 2015 9:14 am 
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Hmm... Was that part of Gibbs' plan? :evillaugh:

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PostPosted: Sat Jun 27, 2015 9:20 am 
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You'll have to wait and find out, Lia. :evillaugh:

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PostPosted: Sat Jun 27, 2015 9:30 am 
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It sure feels like a Gibbs plan, it has to be said. Gun conveniently to hand and her just turning up. It certainly makes sense that the easiest way to ease Tim's compulsion to kill her would be to let him think he had. I don't know what they will be able to do about the fact he now as the compulsion to run for the hills, though! :th_uhoh2: Hopefully he will just drop the gun. I'm guessing it's either loaded with blanks or else she had a vest on (maybe both, just in case), but LEOs encountering him in this state wouldn't have any reason to know whether it was a threat or not, and that could be really bad.

I was overly excited when I recognised the drug name. Scopolamine was featured in an episode of Castle. You know you've been watching too many procedurals when... :rolleyes: :rofl:

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PostPosted: Sat Jun 27, 2015 10:14 am 
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I agree. All the plan. Make him think he had killed her to end the compulsion. But they hadn't counted on him then running and evading capture. It could take them a while to get him, if he slips out of the building.

Loving this. :yes:

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PostPosted: Sat Jun 27, 2015 10:17 am 
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Tim dropped the gun before he started running. Now, they have to catch him.

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PostPosted: Sat Jun 27, 2015 12:46 pm 
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Oh good! I am not very awake today so I'm no doubt missing stuff :th_uhoh2: ;D

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PostPosted: Sun Jun 28, 2015 9:17 am 
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Chapter 8!

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PostPosted: Sun Jun 28, 2015 12:47 pm 
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Ah, Tim... Seems like he's done a "out of the frying pan and into the fire". Hopefully someone can get through to him.

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PostPosted: Sun Jun 28, 2015 1:02 pm 
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He'll need something to break through. Right now, he is still mostly in shock about what happened and hasn't had the time to work through it.

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PostPosted: Sun Jun 28, 2015 7:47 pm 
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Whoah. I can understand his distrust of doctor's now, and an intense desire to get out of the hospital. I hope he doesn't harbor ill feelings towards the team for long.

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PostPosted: Sun Jun 28, 2015 8:26 pm 
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The team feels the same way. It makes sense, but they don't want it to last very long.

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PostPosted: Mon Jun 29, 2015 12:31 pm 
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Chapter 9! Only one to go.

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PostPosted: Mon Jun 29, 2015 8:48 pm 
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I'm glad Tim finally decided to talk to someone, and Gibbs did a good job keeping him on track.

This Dr. Ubica needs to go down :yes:

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PostPosted: Mon Jun 29, 2015 9:24 pm 
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Oh, Dr. Ubica will definitely go down. :yes:

Gibbs knows what to do when it's necessary. It's just a matter of getting to that point.

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PostPosted: Mon Jun 29, 2015 10:36 pm 
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I so love this concept (you always find new and original ways to torture Tim :evillaugh:) and the way you were inspired by the quote. Poor Tim :no: Even simple allergy shots turn horrible in a Teri story. But I do love that despite it all he's fighting it!

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PostPosted: Mon Jun 29, 2015 11:09 pm 
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Aw, thanks, Colleen! I don't know where all these ideas come from, but they're there and the opportunity presents itself. ;D

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PostPosted: Tue Jun 30, 2015 9:14 am 
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Chapter 10 is up! The story is done. :yes:

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PostPosted: Tue Jun 30, 2015 9:28 am 
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Like Colleen said, you do find such unique ways of torturing poor Tim :lol2:

Loved the banter between Tim and Tony at the end. It seemed very much in character. Glad Tim is working on getting back to normal, but I imagine the effects of these events will linger.

Great story! Thanks again for writing it ;D

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PostPosted: Tue Jun 30, 2015 9:29 am 
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I thought it was sweet of Tony to come do something practical and fix what he'd broken :nice: and I'm glad Tim is seeking help and Ubica is getting at least some of his just deserts.

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PostPosted: Tue Jun 30, 2015 9:34 am 
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I'm glad you liked it, Lia. As Barbara can attest, I was strangely worried about writing for you this year. ;D I kept thinking that you'd hate what I wrote. I had fun writing Tony and Tim talking together at the end. I knew I wanted to end with Tony fixing the chain and I kept changing the dialogue, but I had fun with it.

Well, Tony promised he'd buy Tim a new chain when he broke it. He's just keeping his promise. ;D

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PostPosted: Tue Jun 30, 2015 1:18 pm 
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Fun tale, you do get Tim and Tony off well, I am sure Lia is delighted.

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PostPosted: Tue Jun 30, 2015 1:40 pm 
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Thanks, Pat!

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PostPosted: Tue Jun 30, 2015 4:12 pm 
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Love the ending! Well, the whole story. You know. ;D

I especially liked seeing Tim joke around at the end. That was satisfying. :yes:

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PostPosted: Tue Jun 30, 2015 5:58 pm 
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Thanks, Barbara! Tim saying it was only a suggestion was one of the most important parts of that chapter and I liked having him joking about it. :yes:

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PostPosted: Tue Jun 30, 2015 6:12 pm 
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Exactly. :yes: perfect way to end it.

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Really great story from beginning to end :yes: Glad it all worked out in the end.

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PostPosted: Tue Jun 30, 2015 8:32 pm 
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Thanks, Colleen!

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PostPosted: Thu Jul 02, 2015 11:22 pm 
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I had a feeling about what was going to happen before it did and I predicted mostly right but you managed to surprise me with the shooting. My jaw hit the floor at that part because I thought, "Oh God, Tim is gonna have to be on suicide watch after this." I LOVED the scenes with Gibbs and Tony afterward and that Gibbs was able to show him the way back.

Yet another fantastic story. Very much enjoyed reading this. Couldn't stop until the end. I love stories that grab me by the throat like that. :)

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PostPosted: Thu Jul 02, 2015 11:44 pm 
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I'm glad I could surprise you a little bit. Sometimes, I like taking some of the classic motifs. They're classics for a reason, but if I can throw a twist or ten into the story, I will. ;D

One thing I did want, though, is to keep this from diving too deeply into angst. Sometimes, I like swimming around in the angsty waters, but this time, I wanted it to be mostly about the mystery and then about the healing afterward. Less time, wallowing. ;D

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PostPosted: Fri Jul 03, 2015 12:44 am 
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Yeah, most classic motifs are eye-roll worthy because the authors don't do anything original. However, you had enough twists to keep it interesting and the bit about the scopolamine was a pleasure to see - I've only seen it used in crime dramas on TV twice and this is the first time in a fan fiction so that was awesome.

Also glad that Abby was stumped by the drugs in his system. Too often she's portrayed as a literal know-it-all and it was nice that she didn't have all the answers. I expect her to have a lot of them but...well, you get the idea.

I don't mind angst in stories as long as the characters are in-character while they're being angsty. Some authors have gone over the top (I'm probably guilty of this LOL). I think you had just the right amount while still capturing just how upset Tim was...and really, who could blame him? Felt bad for Gibbs too - that's a tough call to have to make with no time to plan.

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PostPosted: Sun Jul 05, 2015 4:47 am 
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A very good read! The whole premise of the story is very clever and you executed it so well, giving us another original villain who plumbs the depths of human behaviour though thankfully his plan was unsuccessful.

I really enjoyed Tony’s attitude here, even when he was on the receiving end of a fist he knew something was ‘off’, in fact the whole team did well even if they all needed time to see just how bad the situation was. I liked how you got inside Tim’s head and showed us his struggle to resist the suggestions implanted in his mind, and I could understand his need to distance himself from the team, he felt betrayed but they really didn’t have any other option and at least he (almost) understood that in the end.

Loved the ‘just a suggestion’ comment to Tony, perfect tone on which to end the story. ;D

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PostPosted: Mon Jul 06, 2015 10:45 am 
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Thanks, Madeline! I wasn't sure this was going to work when I first started writing it. People are going to think I don't trust doctors with all the bad doctors and psychiatrists I've had in my stories. ;D I actually debated how long to examine Tim's feeling of betrayal. I could have lengthened it out a lot, but I decided that I wanted the focus to be on the mystery itself and then, its resolution, rather than all the angst...that I usually write. :)

I'm glad you liked it.

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PostPosted: Wed Jul 08, 2015 12:35 pm 
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Finally read the last two chapters. Amazing story, Teri! Very unique. My favorite scene was between Tim and Gibbs in his basement. The conversation was very sweet and just perfect. :clap:

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PostPosted: Wed Jul 08, 2015 12:55 pm 
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Thanks, Kelly! I really enjoyed writing that scene, too. I didn't want it to be overwrought, but I liked the idea of Tim going to Gibbs.

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